Turning the Other Cheek - Part #1

Sorry, this post is not in reference to the next General Conference talk, but I thought I would write about something I've been pondering today. What does Christ mean when He tells us to turn the other cheek? I feel like there are multiple interpretations of this commandment and I'd like to gain a better understanding of what it really means.

First of all, I do not think Christ wants us to remain in abusive relationships with anyone. Christ does not want us to be in unhealthy relationships with people who are continually hurting us. My husband believes that Christ does not want us to be around people that hurt us but that turning the other cheek simply means to forgive and not hold grudges for people who have. I've heard other people interpret turning the other cheek to mean that we should turn away from people that hurt us. However, I'm wondering if it's not that simple. For example, I have a person in my life with whom I would like to have a wonderful relationship (not romantically). I make many overtures but our relationship, while still good, is not what I consider optimal or ideal. I have been advised by another person (and felt like myself as well sometimes) to stop trying because trying hurts. It sets me up with a hope and then when I get rebuffed, I feel sad and rejected all over again. For awhile, I thought that this was sound advice and that I should strive to just not care anymore but to be ready with open arms when that particular person "wakes up" and wants to have a better relationship. For many situations, it probably is sound advice. But, as I pondered, prayed and thought about it, I realized I didn't feel good about giving up. I felt that I should continue to try in small ways to work on improving the relationship. I felt that in doing this, I would be turning the other cheek and potentially learning more about how God feels when I do not seek a relationship with Him as I should.

An example of turning the other cheek is one my husband mentioned, which occurs in Alma 44 of the Book of Mormon. The Nephites had been attacked by the Lamanites because of their religion. The Nephites were righteous and had been helped by the Lord to defeat the Lamanites in battle. Captain Moroni (leader of the Nephites) then says the following to Zerahemnah (leader of the Lamanites) - these are excerpts from verses 1, 2 and 6:

     "Behold, Zerahemnah, that we do not desire to be men of blood. Ye know that ye are in our hands, yet we do not desire to slay you. Behold, we have not come out to battle against you that we might shed your blood for power; neither do we desire to bring any one to the yoke of bondage. But this is the very cause for which ye have come against us; yea, and ye are angry with us because of our religion...I command you by all the desires which ye have for life, that ye deliver up your weapons of war unto us, and we will seek not your blood, but we will spare your lives, if ye will go your way and come not again to war against us."

(Sorry for the lame footnotes and underlining I can't seem to get rid of - I will get better at this whole blogging thing soon, hopefully).  

Basically, Captain Moroni and his people defended themselves when the Lamanites attacked them, but they did not want to murder them or take revenge for putting them through war. The Nephites were perfectly justified in defending themselves from captivity with physical violence but they only used as much violence as was necessary to defend themselves. I feel like they did the right thing and that this story contains a facet of what it is to turn the other cheek. (I also feel it justifies what I said earlier about not remaining in an abusive/hostile environment or relationship. We need to be assertive in defending ourselves from those who wish to hurt us.)

However, another example from the Book of Mormon also comes to my mind. This story involves the Anti-Nephi-Lehis. These people were previous Lamanites who had previously been evil and war-like but who had been converted. Due to their previous sins and bloodthirsty natures, they made a covenant with the Lord that they would never again shed blood and they buried all their weapons as a symbol of this covenant. The Lamanites still desired to war against the Nephites and take them into captivity if they could and they hated even more the Anti-Nephi-Lehi people for converting to the religion of the Nephites. The people knew the Lamanites were coming with the intent to destroy them but they made no preparations for war. When the Lamanites began attacking the Anti-Nephi-Lehi people, they refused to break their covenant and stood and were killed without raising a hand to defend themselves. It is widely assumed that the men stood in front of the women and children and that is why the sons of that generation were taught by their mothers. After a time (and the murder of 1005 people), the Lamanites stopped attacking. In verses 25 and 26 of Alma 24, it reads (referring to the Lamanites):

"And it came to pass that they threw down their weapons of war, and they would not take them again, for they were stung for the murders which they had committed; and they came down even as their brethren [the Anti-Nephi-Lehis], relying upon the mercies of those whose arms were lifted to slay them. And it came to pass that the people of God were joined that day by more than the number who had been slain; and those who had been slain were righteous people, therefore we have no reason to doubt but what they were saved."

This story is one of the most powerful in all of the scriptures for me. The people were willing to give their lives to keep the covenant promise they had made with the Lord. Their willingness to sacrifice themselves for this promise is an amazing act of faith and had an unexpected blessing: that many of bloodthirsty, attacking Lamanites actually became converted through this example of peace (I don't mean to be irreverent but I also love the out-of-the-box solution). These people must have accepted these members of the Lamanite army and forgiven them, because they were converted to their religion. Thus, the Lamanites must have been taught by those whom they had just attacked. I believe this story truly embodies turning the other cheek. 

Also, we must look to the ultimate example of turning the other cheek: Christ, who was meek in the face of betrayal, persecution, torture and death. Christ had the power to defend Himself from anything man could do, but He chose not to in order to fulfill His Father's higher purpose. There have been and will be times when followers of Christ will be persecuted for His sake and He has shown us how to behave. We must "Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you." Turning the other cheek then means not only NOT seeking revenge or retaliation for wrongs done to us, but a step beyond that: to love and pray for those who we consider our enemies.

Does anyone else have additional comments or insights into the meaning behind this commandment?